We are continuing our Enneagram Series with Beth McCord talking about How to Have A Thriving Relationship with an Enneagram 3. For the next several weeks Beth will be breaking down some real, practical tips for being married to each Enneagram number.
If you are married to a 3 this is YOUR episode. But even if you aren’t married to a 3, we know you will find this episode helpful in learning more about your 3 friends. Part of loving people is knowing people. So use this series as a tool to know your people better, understand them deeper, and love them better.
Beth McCord founded ‘Your Enneagram Coach’ and has been an Enneagram speaker, coach and teacher for over 17 years. She is seriously the best of the best so we are so blessed to have her share her time and expertise with us.
Having been trained by the best Enneagram experts and pouring hundreds of hours into advanced certifications, Beth is leading the industry in simplifying the deep truths of the Enneagram from a Biblical perspective. Beth does one-on-one coaching, in-person events and workshops and online courses. She also offers training and support for those interested in becoming an Enneagram coach. So make sure you give her a follow on Instagram @yourennegramcoach and check out her website yourennegramcoach.com for more great info.
We pray you enjoy learning more about 3s in this episode!
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We are continuing our Enneagram Series with Beth McCord talking about How to Have A Thriving Relationship with an Enneagram 2. For the next several weeks Beth will be breaking down some real, practical tips for being married to each Enneagram number.
If you are married to a 2 this is YOUR episode. But even if you aren’t married to a 2, we know you will find this episode helpful in learning more about your 2 friends. Part of loving people is knowing people. So use this series as a tool to know your people better, understand them deeper, and love them better.
Beth McCord founded ‘Your Enneagram Coach’ and has been an Enneagram speaker, coach and teacher for over 17 years. She is seriously the best of the best so we are so blessed to have her share her time and expertise with us.
Having been trained by the best Enneagram experts and pouring hundreds of hours into advanced certifications, Beth is leading the industry in simplifying the deep truths of the Enneagram from a Biblical perspective. Beth does one-on-one coaching, in-person events and workshops and online courses. She also offers training and support for those interested in becoming an Enneagram coach. So make sure you give her a follow on Instagram @yourennegramcoach and check out her website yourennegramcoach.com for more great info.
We pray you enjoy learning more about 2s in this episode!
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In this episode we have Beth McCord joining Dr. Kim to talk about How to Have A Thriving Relationship with an Enneagram 1. For the next several weeks Beth will be breaking down some real, practical tips for being married to each Enneagram number.
If you are married to a 1 this is YOUR episode. But even if you aren’t married to a 1, we know you will find this episode helpful in learning more about your 1 friends. Part of loving people is knowing people. So use this series as a tool to know your people better, understand them deeper, and love them better.
Beth McCord founded ‘Your Enneagram Coach’ and has been an Enneagram speaker, coach and teacher for over 17 years. She is seriously the best of the best so we are so blessed to have her share her time and expertise with us.
Having been trained by the best Enneagram experts and pouring hundreds of hours into advanced certifications, Beth is leading the industry in simplifying the deep truths of the Enneagram from a Biblical perspective. Beth does one-on-one coaching, in-person events and workshops and online courses. She also offers training and support for those interested in becoming an Enneagram coach. So make sure you give her a follow on Instagram @yourennegramcoach and check out her website yourennegramcoach.com for more great info.
We pray you enjoy learning more about 1s in this episode!
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This episode is a real treat because we have Beth & Jeff McCord joining Dr. Kim. Beth founded Your Enneagram Coach and is an Enneagram speaker, coach and teacher.
Beth & Jeff live outside of Nashville and have been married for 24 years. Combining the gospel and the Enneagram has been instrumental in Beth and Jeff's marriage and parenting.
The Enneagram is simply a map for self-discovery and personal growth based on 9 basic personality types.
When we come to know what’s at the root of our thoughts, feelings and actions, we can stop placing unhealthy and unrealistic expectations on our spouses to “fill us up.” Our marriages can be transformed when our eyes are open to the unique ways our spouse was created, allowing us to better love, serve, communicate and resolve conflict. The Enneagram is simply a tool to self discovery and others discovery. And like Dr. Kim is always saying, we need to be “a student of our spouse.” The Enneagram is one way to do just that.
In this episode Dr. Kim, Beth & Jeff share about how they have used the Enneagram to help create a thriving, gospel-centered marriage.
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Sign up to get Dr. Kim’s One Thing To Grow Your Marriage Each Day via email, text, or podcast here!
In this series we have been dissecting the Top 8 Marriage Issues in 2019. These 8 issues are the top 8 issues that Dr. Kim has seen this year with marriages.
In this episode Dr. Kim & Christina talk about the #1 biggest issue in marriages this year which is: infidelity.
An affair always rocks a marriage. Some couples are able to ride that rocky storm and see God’s grace and redemption in amazing ways. Other couples choose to end a marriage after an affair, and that’s okay too! But in this episode Dr. Kim & Christina talk about why affairs happen and answering the question- can we affair proof a marriage?
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In this episode Dr. Kim and Christina talk about the 2nd biggest issue in marriages this year which is: sexual differences, specifically how to deal with libido differences or loss.
We are happy to be a safe place where you can learn about sex, find yourself relating with other couples in the stories we share, and most importantly - work hard to have great sex in marriage and enjoy this gift God has given us.
In this episode Dr. Kim and Christina share about how to deal with sexual differences in marriage.
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We are doing a series on the Top 8 Marriage Issues in 2019. These 8 issues are the top 8 issues that Dr. Kim has seen this year with marriages. We will be breaking them down starting with #8 and working our way towards the #1 marriage issue.
In this episode Dr. Kim & Christina talk about the 3rd biggest issue in marriages this year which is: values and beliefs.
Our value system and belief system is foundational to all our other opinions and actions in life. So when a couple isn’t on the same page, it can naturally cause many issues.
In this episode Dr. Kim and Christina share about values and beliefs in marriage and how to cope when you and your spouse aren’t on the same page.
NOTEWORTHY QUOTES
“If your spouse doesn’t agree with you on something it can be helpful to rate how important something is to you on a 1 to 10 scale to help your spouse understand how important (less important) something is to you.” - Christina
“Find the hot button topics in your marriage and agree on how to talk about them or agree to disagree with each other if that’s healthier for your marriage.” - Christina
“There are some things in marriage it is absolutely ok to compromise on; one thing you should not do is allow compromise with your spouse to cause you or them to sin.” - Christina
“If you aren’t married yet, be prayerful before going into marriage with someone who’s values and beliefs are much different than your own.” - Dr. Kim
“Pray and ask God for wisdom on how to handle conflict in your marriage in a way that honors Him and honors the vows you made to your spouse, and let Him lead you through it.” - Dr. Kim
“God will sometimes give you more than you can handle so that you turn to Him for help.” - Dr. Kim
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We are doing a series on the Top 8 Marriage Issues in 2019. These 8 issues are the top 8 issues that Dr. Kim has seen this year with marriages. We will be breaking them down starting with #8 and working our way towards the #1 marriage issue.
In this episode Dr. Kim and Christina talk about the 4th biggest issue in marriages this year which is: life stages
We all go through different life stages. One thing is for sure, life does not stay the same. But will we adjust as life goes on? Or will we not adjust?
Our marriage needs to grow and adjust in every new life stage.
In this episode Dr. Kim and Christina share about how to adjust to life stages and keep your marriage strong over the test of time and life’s changes.
NOTEWORTHY QUOTES
“The things you do to connect and have a good marriage will change throughout your marriage.” - Dr. Kim
“There’s value to being and living in the present.” - Christina
“What does it look like to be fruitful where you are right now in life?” - Christina
“As long as you’re on this earth God has a plan and a purpose for you and for your marriage.” - Dr. Kim
“If you talk about it with your spouse then you can plan for it.” - Christina
“If your marriage isn’t growing in each stage of life, that should be a red flag that you need to do something different.” - Dr. Kim
“Don’t let your stage of life define you, you are more than where you are currently at in life.” - Christina
“If your spouse is struggling with adjusting to a new phase of life, come alongside them and let them grieve the loss of the previous season if they need to.” - Dr. Kim
“Find a mentor couple who is ahead of you in life to learn from.” - Christina
“You’ll need to learn to say no to different things in different life stages.” - Dr. Kim
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We are doing a series on the Top 8 Marriage Issues in 2019. These 8 issues are the top 8 issues that Dr. Kim has seen this year with marriages. We will be breaking them down starting with #8 and working our way towards the #1 marriage issue.
In this episode Dr. Kim and Christina talk about the 5th biggest issue in marriages this year which is: traumatic situations.
Because we live in a broken and fallen world, so many couples end up facing traumatic situations. Death of a child, abuse, suicide of someone close to you, assault, a life-changing diagnosis, war, natural disaster, the list goes on. Often times when faced with traumatic situations, naturally, couples struggle to cope and many end up losing their marriage over it. But does a life changing event have to mean the end of your marriage?
Dr. Kim has walked alongside countless couples through life-changing events. A traumatic situation does not have to mean the end of your marriage.
In this episode Dr. Kim and Christina share about how to cope with life-altering and traumatic situations in a way that builds up your marriage instead of tearing it down.
NOTEWORTHY QUOTES
“A traumatic situation is anytime life goes differently than we thought it would.” - Dr. Kim
“Your grief might look different from your spouse’s grief and that’s ok.” - Dr. Kim
“Nobody can’t define what grief looks like for you.” - Dr. Kim
“Allow your spouse to express whatever emotions they feel when they’re grieving.” - Dr. Kim
“Put God in the middle of your grief.” - Dr. Kim
“Be present with your spouse when they’re grieving, don’t put pressure on yourself to say the right thing, your presence alone will help them.” - Dr. Kim
“Be honest when you’re communicating with your spouse about your grief.” - Christina
“Blaming is not going to heal anything.” - Dr. Kim
“After a life-altering event you have to find a new normal.” - Christina
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We are doing a series on the Top 8 Marriage Issues in 2019. These 8 issues are the top 8 issues that Dr. Kim has seen this year with marriages. We will be breaking them down starting with #8 and working our way towards the #1 marriage issue.
In this episode Dr. Kim & Christina talk about the 6th biggest issue in marriages this year which is: stress.
So many of us deal with stress on a regular basis. Being stressed out makes it hard to be a good spouse. It’s hard to be intentional in your marriage or really even focus on your marriage at all when you are consumed with stress. It’s bad for our health and our mental space. Stress piles negative emotions on to our marriage and steals joy.
In this episode Dr. Kim and Christina talk about what stress does to marriages and how to deal with stress in a healthy way as well as some tips to help you eliminate any unnecessary stress in your life.
NOTEWORTHY QUOTES
“People died of diarrhea back then.” - Dr. Kim
“Deciding what you can and can’t do something about can help you be realistic about what you’re stressed about.” - Christina
“If there is nothing that you can do about something, the best (but not always easiest) thing to do is pray about it and leave it in God’s hands.” - Dr. Kim
“Our emotions are good indicators but they’re not good truth tellers.” - Christina
“Ask your spouse to come alongside you and help you deal with your stress.” - Dr. Kim
“Take the time to empathize with your spouse when they’re stressed.” - Dr. Kim
“To the moms: the best thing you can do for your kids is to take care of yourself.” - Christina
“Don’t buy into the lie that stress is just the way you are; there’s an answer to stress.” - Dr. Kim
“God gave you a spouse to walk through life with, don’t push your spouse away in times of stress, embrace them.” - Dr. Kim
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For the next few weeks on the podcast we are doing a series on the Top 8 Marriage Issues in 2019. These 8 issues are the top 8 issues that Dr. Kim has seen this year with marriages. We will be breaking them down starting with #8 and working our way towards the #1 marriage issue.
In this episode Dr. Kim & Christina talk about the 7th biggest issue in marriages this year which is: boredom.
With time, some spouse’s become bored with their relationship. Boredom in marriage is a dangerous thing to dwell on and can easily slip into even bigger issues.
It also doesn’t help that our culture is telling us that monogamy and marriage is boring. But marriage does NOT have to be boring. There are real, practical things you can do to keep boredom at bay and protect your marriage from boredom.
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“Connection = Zero Boredom in marriage.” - Dr. Kim
“You don’t have to be screaming and yelling and throwing things at each other for you to go to marriage counseling.” - Christina
“Boredom can happen if we’re not intentional about giving to our marriage as much as we’re taking from it.” - Dr. Kim
“Be intentional about having fun with each other, even when life gets busy; remember there’s something that got you to the altar in the first place.” - Dr. Kim
“Find creative questions to ask each other.” - Christina
“There are going to be times you get bored in your marriage, it’s about recognizing when that’s happening and committing to reconnecting so you don’t stay bored and disconnected.” - Dr. Kim
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For the next few weeks on the podcast we are doing a series on the Top 8 Marriage Issues in 2019. These 8 issues are the top 8 issues that Dr. Kim has seen this year with marriages in the counseling room. We will be breaking them down starting with number 8 and working our way towards the number 1 marriage issue in 2019.
Today we are kicking off the series with talking about the 8th biggest issue in marriages this year which is: jealousy.
Jealousy puts a real strain on your marriage. When you have jealous feelings it affects you, your spouse, and your marriage. In this episode Dr. Kim and Christina talk about this issue and how to deal with it in a healthy way.
You may think jealousy isn’t a struggle for you, but there are some subtle ways this often plays out that doesn’t always get noticed and addressed.
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“A lot of times jealousy can be tied to insecurity or discontentment.” - Christina
“Paul in the Bible is a great example of being content with whatever he had and whatever situation he was in.” - Dr. Kim
“You can get so consumed with jealousy that you neglect your marriage.” - Dr. Kim
“Jealousy affects your ability to be present in your marriage.” - Christina
“If you are willing to be honest with yourself and why you’re jealous, these jealous feelings can be an opportunity for God to grow and teach you.” - Christina
“You have to run your race, you can’t run someone else’s race.” - Christina
“If your spouse is struggling with jealousy, it gives you an opportunity to come alongside them and help them work through those feelings.” - Dr. Kim
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Can we implement boundaries with our spouse? Is it loving? Is it Christ-centered?
Boundaries in marriage may seem counterintuitive to some, but we believe it should be normal and natural in a marriage.
In this episode, Dr. Kim and Christina share about boundaries with your spouse: why you need them, examples of what they might be, and how to implement them. If you have never thought about boundaries with your spouse, we hope this conversation is helpful to you and that it provides you with some great talking points that you and your spouse can explore as you work to have a healthier, happier, holier marriage.
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“You can help your spouse see that they might need to set a boundary with someone by asking them questions.” - Dr. Kim
“You can encourage your spouse to learn about boundaries but also be willing to walk with them through what that will look like.” - Christina
“Always offer your thoughts on your spouse’s situation as a suggestion, not as a solution to their problem.” - Dr. Kim
“You might need to set a boundary with someone if you’re taking on their consequences.” - Christina
“If you’ve never set boundaries before start setting them in safe places first.” - Christina
“Remember that if someone doesn’t respond to the boundaries that you set in a healthy way, you can only control yourself, you can’t control how they will react.” - Dr. Kim
“It sounds silly but role playing setting boundaries with your spouse can be really helpful for them to prepare for those hard conversations.” - Christina
“Let your spouse know that you are not going to stop loving them if they set a healthy boundary with you.” - Christina
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Can we implement boundaries with our spouse? Is it loving? Is it Christ-centered?
Boundaries in marriage may seem counterintuitive to some, but we believe it should be normal and natural in a marriage.
In this episode, Dr. Kim and Christina share about boundaries with your spouse: why you need them, examples of what they might be, and how to implement them. If you have never thought about boundaries with your spouse, we hope this conversation is helpful to you and that it provides you with some great talking points that you and your spouse can explore as you work to have a healthier, happier, holier marriage.
NOTEWORTHY QUOTES
“Boundaries with your spouse can actually draw you closer together.” - Dr. Kim
“Having boundaries in your marriage isn’t meant to be a punishment, it’s meant to be freeing for you and your spouse.” - Christina
“You can’t have true intimacy without boundaries.” - Christina
“I tell singles that I counsel, you have to show the person you’re dating the real you at some point during the dating process.” - Dr. Kim
“It’s unloving and unwise to not set boundaries where they need to be.” - Christina
“To rescue people from the natural consequences of their behavior is to render them powerless.” - Dr. Henry Cloud & John Townsend (from Boundaries book)
“It’s so important to talk about boundaries in your sexual relationship.” - Dr. Kim
“Boundaries helps you understand your marriage relationship better.” - Dr. Kim
“Your spouse’s comfortability should matter to you more than what you want for yourself.” - Christina
“Boundaries are about controlling the only person that you can control: yourself.” - Christina
“Don’t set boundaries to manipulate or control your spouse.” - Dr. Kim
“If you’re in an unhealthy relationship, be prepared for setting boundaries to cause a lot of conflict.” - Dr. Kim
“A boundary without consequences isn’t a boundary at all.” - Christina
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Everyone has the same amount of time - 24 hours in a day. But so many of us struggle to manage this time well. Some of us say yes to way too many things and then that leaves us burnt out and miserable. Others of us don’t use our time wisely enough and don’t steward their time well to get done what they need to get done.
In the fast paced, hustle glorified, culture that we live in where everyone has access to you all the time it can be really hard to set limits on our time. But if we don’t plan well, our time will just pass us by. But if we do plan well and set up healthy boundaries, we can have healthier relationships, a better marriage, and get off the "hustle til you’re burnt out" game that way too many of us are playing.
In this episode, Dr. Kim and Christina share about the importance of setting up time boundaries and how to implement them.
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What does it look like to honor our marriage, protect our marriage, and still have honoring relationships with our brothers and sisters in Christ?
So many couples want to know what is okay and not okay when it comes to friendships with the opposite sex.
In this episode, Dr. Kim and Christina share about safe boundaries, why they are important, and how to implement them practically.
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Well we love it when you guys send it topics you want us to cover! One listener recently suggested we cover what it means to “come alongside your spouse.” It’s something Dr. Kim says a lot, what does it practically mean? How would Dr. Kim define this method that he so often encourages us to do?
In this episode, Dr. Kim goes deep into describing it and defining it for us.
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In this episode Caroline Harries joins Dr. Kim to talk about waiting and how God is good even in the waiting. They talk about infertility, support groups, and how infertility and waiting can affect your marriage.
Caroline is an author of a 60-day devotional ‘In Due Time’ as well as the founder of ‘Moms in the Making’ faith based infertility support groups. She shares her story and talks open and honestly about her waiting and their marriage in the waiting.
Chances are you are waiting on something. Maybe it’s a baby, maybe it’s a house, a job, a fresh start, or restored relationship. Whatever it is you’re waiting on - this conversation is going to encourage you.
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The holidays can highlight grief and loss in our life. It’s a time that is centered around nostalgia, memories, and family. So it’s no surprise that the holidays can bring up a lot of grief for people who have experienced loss.
In this episode Dr. Kim and Christina talk about grief and how to support each other as a married couple as one or both of you grieve.
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The holidays are coming and that excites some of you but stresses others out. The holidays season, especially Thanksgiving and Christmas can put a lot of extras on our calendars and in our budgets. It can be a time where couples fight a lot or expectations aren’t met.
All of us want to have good holidays with our spouse and family, but often we don’t prepare well so that we can execute that well.
In this episode Dr. Kim and Christina talk about holiday marital stress and how to prepare for the holidays with your spouse.
Tune in to learn how to prepare well for the holidays!
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What does it mean to be a husband and how can Christian men prepare well to become godly husbands? There are a lot of messages out there today about men and what it looks like to a husband, but what does God say about being a husband? How can modern men prepare to be Godly leaders in their home?
In this episode Colby Taylor joins Dr. Kim to talk about that. Colby is a Pastor at Life.Church and good friend of mine. Together Colby and his wife, who you heard from on Tuesday, lead the Engaged Events we put on to help couples prepare for a marriage that’s even more beautiful than the wedding. The next Engaged Event in OK is THIS month so be sure to grab tickets on our website before they sell out.
Tune in to learn how to prepare to be a husband!
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What does it mean to be a wife? How can we prepare well to be good wives? In a world where the world “wife” is displayed so differently depending on where we are turning to, it can be really confusing. Christian women who are planning to get married have desires to be a godly wife. But most of us don’t know how to prepare for that.
In this episode Amanda Taylor joins Dr. Kim to talk about preparing to be a wife.
Tune in to learn how to prepare to be a wife!
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“Peace” and “wedding planning” may seem like 2 things that don’t go together. But we want to help you keep the peace during your wedding planning process. This is part 2 of a conversation with Dr. Kim & Amanda Taylor talking about all things wedding planning and how to do this well with your relationship intact and healthy ready to start your new marriage.
Amanda is the owner of Embellished Weddings here in Oklahoma City where she plans and coordinates weddings. Because Amanda has planned so many weddings, she has an up close look at couples during this time. I can’t for you to hear what she shares in this episode!
Tune in to learn how to keep the peace during wedding planning.
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Weddings are a big deal and wedding planning can be extremely stressful. Tensions are high and family is involved and it seems like there are so many emotions and expectations that are swirling around. It’s enough to make you go crazy! And maybe some of us do just that - go a little crazy.
Well we want to avoid the crazy as much as we can and learn to keep the peace during wedding planning.
In this episode Amanda Taylor joins Dr. Kim to talk about keeping the peace during wedding planning. Amanda is a return guest on the podcast. Amanda and Colby have been married for 12 years and have 6 beautiful children. Amanda is the owner of Embellished Weddings here in Oklahoma City where she plans and coordinates weddings. Because Amanda has planned so many weddings, she has an up close look at couples during this time.
Tune in to learn how to keep the peace during wedding planning.
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In this episode Dr. Kim and Christina share a dozen secrets husbands don’t tell their wives. We polled you guys on Instagram to get your real and honest answers and today we are sharing those secrets (anonymously).
Some of these secrets might surprise you and I bet you’ll relate to some if not all of them!
Our hope is that shedding light on these secrets will deepen your connection and that you and your spouse will have some real, honest conversations about this episode that will lead to more a more transparent friendship between you two.
Tune in to find out what husbands aren’t telling their wives!
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