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Awesome Marriage Podcast

Far too many couples are just surviving their marriage when it was meant to thrive. This is the place for practical tips on how to build an awesome marriage. Our passion is to help you strengthen your marriage. Dr. Kim Kimberling hosts the show. Dr. Kim is the President of Awesome Marriage, has been married for 53 years, and has been a professional counselor for 40 years. He is the author of 7 Secrets to An Awesome Marriage and 14 Keys To Lasting Love. Dr. Kim is joined by co-host Lindsay Few, Content Director for Awesome Marriage. She has been married for 20 years. Her husband is a church planter, and they love ministering to married couples together. Tune in each week to hear practical ways on how to have an awesome marriage! This podcast is brought to you by the ministry of Awesome Marriage.
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Now displaying: Page 1
Jun 21, 2024

Most of us deal with self doubt, regret, and feelings of not measuring up. But learning to love ourselves properly means learning to see ourselves as God does, and it allows us to love others more freely and graciously. 

 

Today, Bryan Crum will help you step away from nagging self doubts and into a solid biblical perspective. Give your marriage the gift of seeing yourself and your spouse through God’s eyes.

 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • Unexpected lessons learned from people who are facing their mortality 

  • Why is it hard to accept loving and valuing ourselves properly? 

  • Rewriting negative messages we’ve learned 

  • Ideas to break away from self-doubt 

  • Why relationships are needed to help us learn to love ourselves 

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

QUOTES 

  • “I’m on a mission to help people fall in love with God’s greatest creation; and that’s us.” - Bryan Crum 

  • “We all want to know our time on this earth means something.” - Bryan Crum 

  • “I’ve discovered 2 truths about living: 1. We’re priceless. 2. For some reason, we’ve forgotten that truth.” - Bryan Crum 

  • “We interact with people every day but we don’t always treat them like they are valuable.” - Bryan Crum 

  • “When we acknowledge the truth of what we’re worth, we’re acknowledging a truth heaven knows well.” - Bryan Crum 

  • “The first step is to stop comparing ourselves to each other.” - Bryan Crum 

  • “There's power in giving each other the benefit of the doubt.”   - Bryan Crum 

  • “Giving each other grace is a small step that covers a lot of distance.” - Bryan Crum 

  • “Marriage is promising each other that we’re all-in. We’ve got to make the conscious choice to say, ‘I’m still here.’”  - Bryan Crum 



MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

 

Jun 19, 2024

Conflict is no one’s favorite, but it is an inevitable part of life. And today Donna Jones teaches us why it’s nothing to be afraid of by busting some of the most common misunderstandings that lead to conflict avoidance, and providing a biblical roadmap to handle conflict in a healthy way. 

Tune in to learn more about approaching conflict in a healthy, biblical way. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • The biggest mistakes most couples make in conflict 

  • The trick to de-escalate in the heat of the moment. 

  • The inner characteristics that build better conflict habits 

  • Help to break conflict patterns in your marriage 

  • The healthy way to apologize well

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

QUOTES 

  • “When we handle conflict in a healthy way, the outcome is peace. Peace between us and who we have conflict with; peace in our own souls.” - Donna Jones 

  • “When we are in conflict, it literally affects everything about us. We function, but on the inside, we’re torn to pieces.” - Donna Jones 

  • “The reason so many of us think conflict is bad, is that we never learned to see how conflict can turn out good.”  - Donna Jones 

  • “When we have conflict, we tend to think it means 1 of 3 things: There’s something wrong with you; there’s something wrong with me, or there’s something wrong with us. But conflict doesn’t mean that.” - Donna Jones 

  • “No relationship can survive an atmosphere of disrespect over the long haul.”  - Donna Jones 

  • “The most important thing is not an act, it’s an attitude: Humility.”  - Donna Jones 

  • “If you want to know how strong a person really is, look for humility.” - Donna Jones 



MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Jun 18, 2024

We have gotten a lot of questions about gaslighting and narcissism, and today Dr. Kim is answering. This topic is layered and one podcast episode cannot take the place of more in-depth interventions, but we can offer helpful and hopeful next steps. In today’s episode we’re covering how to know what constitutes abuse versus the sin nature we all struggle with. Listen for 

 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • Marriage counseling doesn’t work with abusers – So what does?

  • Can a marriage recover after long-term gaslighting? 

  • How to diagnose abuse using the power and control wheel

  • Does the “gray rock” strategy work in marriage?  

  • Reasons why emotional abuse is often dismissed 

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

QUOTES 

  • “Narcissism is all about power and control. Neither of those have a place in marriage at all.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “I don't think God expects anyone to live in an abusive situation. In many ways, it’s as much a violation of vows as adultery is to not take seriously your vow to love and cherish your spouse.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “You deserve to be safe.”  - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “If you look at the message of the BIble, you can’t defend any type of abuse, for any person, ever.”  - Lindsay Few 

  • “The goal would be repentance and reconciliation.” - Lindsay Few  

  • “The reason a lot of people minimize emotional abuse because they haven’t seen it.”  - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “I’ve seen people who gaslight and don't really understand what they’ve been doing.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “Nobody’s uplifted or brought closer to Christ through manipulative behaviors.” - Lindsay Few 

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Jun 14, 2024

Is there a war on fathers? Our guest on today’s podcast thinks so. The impact of fathers on their kids is so valuable, yet it’s incredibly difficult to know how to engage purposefully in the process of parenting. 

 

If you’ve had a hand in raising kids, you already know that parenting is not for the faint of heart! That’s why we are so thankful to share today’s episode and Kent Evans’ practical advice and encouragement for dads. Kent Evans is a wise and helpful mentor for dads who are searching for their purpose in parenting. Listen and learn Kent’s simple, practical tips for dads and moms alike. 

 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • What prevents dads from being confident to engage in fatherhood? 

  • The reasons why your kids need an imperfect dad 

  • Advice for the dad who feels like it’s too late to start to engage well  

  • Steps to growing in your purpose as a dad 

  • Advice for the wife who wants her husband to engage 

  • An incredible tip for finding friends & community 

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

QUOTES 

  • “Satan wants us to take us out of the fatherhood game by getting us to self-select and walk off the field.” - Kent Evans 

  • “God wants to be known as a dad, therefore there’s a war on fathers.”  - Kent Evans 

  • “My experience as a dad is that God can take care of the things I mess up.” - Dr. Kim 

  • “Even if we could be perfect, it would not be beneficial. It would deprive them of the example of how to fall off the horse then get back on.” - Kent Evans 

  • There are few things more motivating to a man than the praise of his wife, but it’s multiplied by an exponent when she does it in front of the children.” - Kent Evans 

  • “I didn’t get it right. I didn’t do it perfectly, but God took my loaves and fishes and they landed as nourishment.”

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Jun 11, 2024

Marriage doesn’t have to get boring … but for too many couples, it has. If you’re ready to break out of the routine and restore the joy in your marriage, this one's for you! 

 

Listen for ways to have more interesting and connective conversations, new ideas of things to try, and how to avoid common mistakes that keep couples from enjoying their marriage. 

 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • Better questions to ask for better conversations

  • 2 common mistakes that keep couples from having fun together 

  • Several ideas for fun things to try 

  • For Dr. Kim’s bullet point list of steps, sign up for the Conversation Guide

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

QUOTES 

  • “When we’re dating our future wife, we guys up our game.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “We loved our time with our kids, but we realized we also had to be intentional about our marriage.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “You have to give yourself time to do the fun stuff. The mundane will still be there when you’re done.” - Lindsay Few 

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 



Jun 7, 2024

Do you ever feel like you and your spouse are two ships passing in the night? Strangers living under the same roof? Business partners executing the plans you’ve made for your kids and household? Then you’re in a disconnected marriage. The marriage relationship should nurture both spouses.

If you’ve lost the connection in your marriage, or just want to step up from where you are right now, tune in today to learn the practical steps for reconnecting. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • Why do couples disconnect? 

  • The steps to reconnection

  • A helpful source for fun marriage ideas and resources 

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here



QUOTES 

  • “Little tweaks can make such a difference.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “Living separate lives is not going to get you a connected, fun marriage.” Christina Dodson 

  • “We weren’t always there but we chose to stay in the marriage and work through things. It’s worth it.”  - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “You can continue to grow, but you have to work at it.”   - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

 

Jun 4, 2024

If your marriage communication is a struggle, you are NOT alone. So many marriage issues come back to communication, and if your communication is awesome, your marriage will be too! But most of us will have some trouble with communicating well with our spouse, and it’s the biggest issue couples ask us for help with. That’s why today we’re equipping you with 6 tips to communicate well in the good times and in the bad. 

 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • How to talk so your spouse can listen 

  • Use the “title page” trick to help your spouse listen to you 

  • Dr. Kim’s 6 tips to communicate well

  • How to find a good counselor if you need one 

  • How to restart the openness & honesty in your marriage 

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

QUOTES 

  • “I think what happens for guys is that when we’re dating our future wife, we up our game.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “It’s hard for me to put my thoughts and feelings into succinct words.I can easily ramble on… but that doesn’t make for good communication.” - Lindsay Few 

  • “The bottom line is you want them to hear what you’re saying, so how do you best communicate in a way that they’re going to hear it?”  - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “If you’re going through a hard time, call it that. Work together to reclaim your time and energy.” - Lindsay Few 

  • “We can’t give away every piece of our heart, mind, time and energy to things that drain the life out of us.” - Lindsay Few 



MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

May 31, 2024

It often feels like the world around us is too broken. Where would you even start if you wanted to try and fix it? On the podcast today, Charlie and Andi Ashworth answer this question, and thankfully their answer is much simpler and more doable than it might seem. 

The Ashworths have spent decades sharing their creative gifts and encouraging others to do the same, and in today’s episode they artfully equip you to take small steps toward creativity, community, and reflecting the light of God’s love, right where you are. 

Don’t miss this bonus episode!  We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • How should Christians engage with culture? 

  • A call for culture making - and how simple it is to actually do it 

  • Why the small things matter - and how to use them for good in your life

  • Hope for becoming the remedy to the loneliness epidemic

  • How to balance the desire for creativity and the need to get things done  

  • Battling the dis-integration of “mundane” versus doing things we like 

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

QUOTES

  • “We make less and less meaning of everything now, because it’s happening so fast and we’re receiving so much information.” - Charlie Ashworth

  • “There’s no small people; there’s no small things. Everything matters.”  - Charlie Ashworth

  • “We don’t know the stories that will continue after we do.” - Andi Ashworth 

  • “If all of life matters to God, then all of life matters to us.” - Andi Ashworth 

  • “We want a formula … but it is a process.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling  

  • “Based on your faith in Christ, what kind of culture are you making? Are you contributing good? Or are you contributing negativity?” - Charlie Ashworth  

  • “It’s antithetical to the word of God and to creation itself to think that we as people of God are somehow standing outside of it. It actually creates an ‘us’ versus ‘them’ mentality that is so unhealthy.” - Charlie Ashworth  

  • “Start with where you're at: You're actually getting up and making culture every day.” - Andi Ashworth

  • “As an artist, maturity looks like a seamless integration of a diversity of creativity over time.” - Charlie Peacock 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

 

May 28, 2024

Your marriage needs trust in order to be healthy. Without it, your connection with your spouse will fade, and you’ll experience more conflict and tension, and less of the closeness and intimacy marriage is meant to have. Don’t stay stuck like this! Turn things around by closing the trust gaps between you and your spouse and make your marriage a safe refuge for both of you. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • Areas where you might not realize you lack trust  

  • How to address it effectively with your spouse - without blaming 

  • How to have grace in the rebuilding process

  • Tips to building financial trust

  • Practical tips to become more trustworthy with completing tasks 

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here



QUOTES 

  • “Without trust in a marriage, the marriage just crumbles.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling  

  • “We don’t realize how valuable trust is until it’s broken.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “Trust can be unique to the person and the situation.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “We have to own what’s driving our trust-breaking behavior.” - Lindsay Few

  • “The budget isn’t a prison, it’s a plan. But sometimes it will be uncomfortable.” - Lindsay Few

  • “The sooner you go to counseling, the sooner you’ll resolve your issues.” - Lindsay Few

  • “If you get stuck, you don’t have to stay stuck.”  - Lindsay Few

  • “Your spouse may make some mistakes, so look for Jesus in your spouse.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling

  • “I felt like he should trust me … but my action was not giving him anything to trust.” - Lindsay Few 

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

 

May 24, 2024

Today we answer some of the most frequently asked questions we hear about sex. Dr. Kim and Christina covered this on an episode in 2021, and we’ve distilled their conversation into the most timeless and practical answers to common sex questions. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.  

Episode highlights include:  

  • How often is “normal”?

  • Dealing with dead sex drive 

  • Is oral sex ok in marriage? What about anal? 
  • Is there such thing as too much sex when trying to conceive? 

  • How to start talking to your kids about sex 

  • What do do if your spouse withholds sex

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

QUOTES 

  • “Guys, you have to continue to be romantic.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “I wanted my kids to talk to me about sex before they went to a friend or read it on a bathroom wall or a magazine. You want that door to be open.”  - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “You need to honor each other and respect each other’s body to honor God in marriage.” - Christina Dodson

  • “Guys, if you please your wife first, does it really matter when you orgasm? There's this unspoken pressure.” - Christina Dodson 

  • “There’s always an answer. I’ve never had a couple we couldn’t figure out an answer for.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling

  • “Stay at the comfort level of the one who is least comfortable. If you do that, you’re going to be ok.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

 

May 21, 2024

Trust in marriage is not one-size-fits all. There are many areas where your marriage needs trust in order to thrive, and some might matter to your spouse more than they do to you, and vice versa. So today we’re talking about how to navigate any trust gaps you may have with your spouse, how to start the conversation about it, and rebuild what’s been broken so you both feel more connected and secure in your marriage.

 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • Several types of trust marriages need, and why they matter

  • The side effects of missing trust 

  • Simple steps to catch a trust slip-up so that trust is not broken

  • Specific trust-killers you need to avoid 

  • How to build trust - and keep it

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

QUOTES 

  • “It helps to build trust if you accept me as I am, not as you wish I would be.” - Lindsay Few 

  • “I may not even be aware if I did something that affected the trust, and I want to know.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “If it’s important to her and it keeps coming up, I want her to tell me about it.” Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “I’d be so offended when he didn’t trust me, but when I think about the reality, I wasn’t trustworthy.” - Lindsay Few 

  • “Trust is between two people. It’s not just your perception of yourself.” - Lindsay Few 

  • “It’s not like we quit making mistakes, it’s just that we handle them differently now.”  - Dr. Kim Kimberling 



MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

  • What would happen if you took the next 4 weeks to reframe your spouse and your marriage with a biblical approach? Cultivate a better perspective – and a better marriage, with our Reframing Challenge

  • Sign up HERE to get the Couple’s Conversation Guide for each week’s new episode 

  • Does your sex life need a reboot? Improve your sex life with our Locking Lips Kissing Game

  • If your marriage has been damaged by porn, the Marriage Undefiled Online Course provides a path to rebuild trust and repair your marriage.  

  • Click HERE to get the Couple’s Conversation Guide for each week’s new episode! 

  • The free printable Weekly Check Up is a simple way to keep short accounts and keep building trust.

May 14, 2024

Does lust have a place in marriage? What sets it apart from sexual desire? Today we’re working through the reasons this question matters for your marriage, and how to have a marriage that glorifies God in every aspect, including how you steward your sexual desires. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

  •  Defining the difference between lust and desire, biblically 

  • The godly purposes for sexual desire in marriage

  • Specific reasons why misused sexual desire is destructive 

  • How to maintain purity in marriage 

  • Why porn affects your marriage even if your spouse doesn’t know you use it

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

QUOTES 

  • “Lust is more about what you see, what you’re attracted to and what it can do for you.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling

  • “In the Bible, it’s not like they lived in a Puritanical culture at that time. No, it was probably every bit as bad…we just access things in a different way now.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling

  • “If we look at Scripture, lust was never mentioned in a positive light.” - Lindsay Few 

  • “We won’t ever clear that bar, but he’s taken care of it through his life, death and resurrection, so there is grace and forgiveness.” - Lindsay Few 

  • “The best sex is within the context of a Christian marriage.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling

  • “If it’s reduced to that ‘just get it over with’ kind of situation, whoa. Red flag. The goal is not just to satisfy the urge, the goal is mutual enjoyment, pleasure, connection and building of the marriage.” - Lindsay Few

  • “Vulnerability is uncomfortable, but it can lead you to prevent something a lot more painful.” - Lindsay Few 

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:  

 

May 7, 2024

Most couples are not going to be completely aligned with sex drive. There are a lot of factors that  can cause this, but there are also a lot of solutions!

Today we want to equip you to have a productive approach to making your sex life the best it can be in marriage. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • Why is it so hard to have a productive conversation about sex? 

  • Should the lower-drive spouse “just do it” for the spouse’s sake? Why or why not? 

  • Why respecting your wife’s drive level helps her feel sexy 

  • Ways to respect your spouse’s drive 

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

  • What would happen if you took the next 4 weeks to reframe your spouse and your marriage with a biblical approach? Learn how to have a better perspective – and a better marriage, with our Reframing Challenge

  • Does your sex life need a reboot? Improve your sex life with our Locking Lips Kissing Game

  • If your marriage has been damaged by porn, the Marriage Undefiled Online Course provides a path to rebuild trust and repair your marriage.  

  • Click HERE to get the Couple’s Conversation Guide for each week’s new episode! 

 

Apr 30, 2024

Do you hope to break generational patterns of pain? Are childhood hurts haunting your marriage? Today’s guest Kristen Hallinan is a writer and speaker, and today she helps you see how to identify and break generational patterns to find hope, healing and redemption.

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  •  How your past trauma can affects your current reactions 

  • What makes it so hard to break cycles 

  • Red flags of unhealthy family dynamics 

  • How to work with God to find his redemption 

  • Steps to making a redemption plan for your marriage 

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here



QUOTES

  • “It can be easy to say, ‘Why didn’t I know better?’ You didn’t know better because that’s all you knew.” - Kristen Hallinan 

  • “The more I’ve gotten to know who God is, the more I understand who I am.”- Kristen Hallinan 

  • “I used to believe if I just tried hard enough, I could grow up and create this perfect family.” - Kristen Hallinan 



MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Apr 25, 2024

Today we are sharing the final episode with Kathy McAtee Young and her story of finding safety after decades in an abusive marriage. In this episode Kathy shares some of the barriers that prevent spouses in abusive marriages from seeking safety and help, ways to begin moving out of the abusive relationship, and the ways healing begins afterward. 

 

Don’t miss the conclusion to Kathy’s story. We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • Reasons that abused spouse don’t trust their own judgment

  • Steps to get out of an abusive marriage

  • Is it ever appropriate to intervene if you believe someone is being abused? 

  • What the process of healing looks like after you get safe

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here



QUOTES

  • “One of the hallmarks of an unsafe relationship is confusion.” - Kathy McAtee Young  

  • “God sees you. He cares. And he is faithful.” - Kathy McAtee Young 

  • “We don’t want your pity. Compassion, yes. There is a difference.” - Kathy McAtee Young

  • “Healing is a lifestyle, not a finish line.” - Kathy McAtee Young 

  • “When you can name it, then you can process it.”  - Kathy McAtee Young

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 



Apr 24, 2024

Today in Part 2 of Kathy’s story, Kathy shares the ways she sought support from the church when she realized her marriage was in trouble, the responses she received, and the effects that had on her marriage. In this episode Kathy shares why it’s not possible for the abused spouse to end the abuse, and the difference between biblical versus unbiblical advice about abuse. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

  •  Interventions the church put in place, and why they were not successful 

  • The wake up moment that turned things around for Kathy 

  • What is an appropriate response to spousal abuse? 

  • The red flags that advice or counsel about abuse is unbiblical 

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

  • Red flags that advice or counsel about abuse is unbiblical 

    • They won’t call out that abuse is abuse

    • They will not call the abuse sin

    • The safety of the abused spouse is not top priority 

    • There is no call for repentance 

    • They advise you to stay, regardless 

    • Blaming the abused for the abuse

QUOTES

  • “There is one person responsible for abuse: It is the abuser.” - Kathy McAtee Young 

  • “The Bible definitely commands forgiveness. It does not command reconciliation.”  - Kathy McAtee Young 

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Apr 23, 2024

When does an unhealthy marriage become an abusive marriage? Where can you go when you need to get out? In today’s episode we hear part 1 of Kathy’s real marriage story. Kathy shares how she came to believe that divorce was the most God-honoring option in her situation, and how she found safety after 30+ years in an emotionally abusive marriage. 

We are so grateful to Kathy for generously sharing her story. We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • Dispelling myths about who falls into abuse 

  • Why marriage counseling does not work in abusive marriages

  • How Kathy learned her marriage was abusive

  • Why she stayed as long as she did, and why she later divorced  

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

 

QUOTES

  • “I want to debunk the myth that abused women are poorly educated, lower income, women who can easily be taken advantage of. That’s just not accurate.”  - Kathy McAtee Young 

  • “Within the first year, I knew we had trouble…” - Kathy McAtee Young  

  • “Marriage counseling does not work if there’s abuse involved. I know that now.” - Kathy McAtee Young 

  • “Most people who are narcissists are really good at it.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “You have this idea that, ‘If she could fix all these things, then I wouldn’t be this way.’ That’s the blame shifting.” - Kathy McAtee Young 

  • “The heart of abuse is power and control. Everything else is tactics.” - Kathy McAtee Young 

Apr 16, 2024

Do you fight fair, or do you wish there was a referee to call a stop to the foul play when you argue with your spouse? Ground rules are an important step toward having healthy marriage conflict, so today Dr. Kim will spell out how to make sure you’re fighting fair in your marriage. We want to empower you to fight fair, and resolve issues in a kind and loving way. 

If you need help to fight fair and truly resolve issues without making things worse, you will love today’s conversation. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • The DOs and DON’Ts of fighting fair 

  • The side effects of unhealthy conflict 

  • A healthy way to “let it all out” 

  • Can honesty go too far?  How do you know? 

  • Tips to the reconnection process - how to make up well 

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

QUOTES

  • “We both learned we needed to reconnect and apologize, but sometimes we werent’ ready to take that step at the same time. We had to learn that somebody needs to take the step. It doesn’t really matter who started the fight or who was wrong.” 

  • “Taking responsibility is huge. Owning your part in it, even if you think you only did 10%, you still did 10%.”

  • “What are you sorry for? Be very specific in what you did and why you're taking responsibility.”

  • “I say it a lot: One of the best gifts you can give your marriage is to learn how to resolve conflict.” 

  • Forgiveness and apologies need to have no strings attached. It’s just that I choose to do this. 

  • We’re not just trying to clear a slate so our spouse stops bugging us. Have you repented before the Lord? That’s where this starts. 

  • We are accountable to Him before being accountable to our spouse. Did I just treat my spouse in the way He would have me treat them? If not, I need to take that up with Him 

 

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

  • When you really think about it, how did it affect your spouse when you had this conflict? 

  • Repentance. Learning from the mistakes made and committing to work on them together. 

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

 

Apr 9, 2024

Sick of the same old fights over and over with your spouse? Learn to de-escalate marriage fights and resolve issues in a healthy and helpful way. Conflict in marriage is inevitable, but the way you handle it is what matters most. Learning to deal with it well will benefit your marriage in so many ways! Tune in today to learn how. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

  • Common conflict pitfalls to avoid

  • The problem with “winning” marriage fights 

  • Tips to help you break the fighting cycle

  • What to do if one spouse is not ready to reconnect 

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

  • Are you stuck in a conflict cycle? If so, work together to identify what’s triggering it. 

  • Choose 1 tip from Dr. Kim’s list below that you will both agree to use this week. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

QUOTES

  • “When we try our best to avoid conflict, we’re not really equipping ourselves with the skills to handle it well.” - Lindsay Few 

  • “Awareness gives you some insight that can really be useful.” Dr. Kim Kimberling 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

  • Learn more about how to make your marriage conflict healthy by joining Dr. Kim for the 8 Guidelines for Fighting Fair Webinar 

  • Our Conflict Resolution Cheat Sheet is your quick guide to get marriage conflict on the right track. 

  • If you’re ready to learn how to do conflict well, the Conflict Resolution Guide helps you diagnose the problem areas in your marriage, then learn the steps to resolve them. 

  • It’s here! Our 7 Most Popular Resource Bundle is LIVE! That means you can get 7 of our most-loved marriage building resources by making 1 donation of ANY amount to support the ministry of Awesome Marriage! The bundle is available for a limited time only. Get all the details here!  

 

Mar 22, 2024

Learn how conflict can create a deeper connection between you and your spouse. Today’s special guest, marriage coach Dana Che is very open about the struggles her marriage faced. In today’s episode she shares her marriage story, what got them through, and how you can use the conflict you face in marriage to draw you toward deeper connection. 

 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • What we can learn from our conflict triggers

  • How to deal with different conflict styles in marriage 

  • Steps to break generational cycles in your marriage 

  • The power of speaking life to our spouse and our marriage 

  • How being emotionally unavailable tends to show up in husbands and in wives & what to do about it  

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here



QUOTES

  • “As a wife, I knew I couldn’t change my husband … but that didn’’ keep me from trying.” Dana Che 

  • “When you actually engage in conflict, you can start to learn more about your spouse, what’s important to them.” -Dana Che 

  •  “You’ve got to feed the right things if you want to change the wrong things.” - Dana Che 

  • “Just like you learned that bad behavior, you can unlearn it and learn something new.” Dana Che 

  • “True repentance is visible.” Dana Che 

  • “What we believe, we will begin to speak. What we speak, we will begin to behave.” Dana Che



QUESTIONS FOR YOU

  • What does your most recent marriage conflict reveal about what’s most valuable to you?  

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

  • Find more from Dana at DanaChe.com, where you can take her “Connection Check” quiz 

  • Listen to the “Real Relationship Talk” podcast 

  • Joining Marriage Changers now means you score a huge haul of marriage-building goods when our annual *7 Most-Popular Resource Bundle* goes live on April 2nd! 

 

Mar 19, 2024

Why do Christians need counseling? Isn’t the Gospel enough to transform us? We hear these questions fairly often. Today Dr. Kim and special guest Jason VanRuler dive deeper into these questions and the conversation about the role of therapy and counseling in a life devoted to following Jesus.

Don’t miss this helpful conversation! We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

  • How often do clients have no idea that they haven’t gotten past their past? 

  • Unexpected ways your past might be showing up & affecting your marriage today

  • Updating the negative messages we believe about ourselves 

  • The effect of vulnerability on our marriage connection 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

QUOTES

  • “Where there's a disconnect in relationships, it’s often a disconnect from the system we witnessed growing up and what we’re trying to make happen today.” - Jason VanRuler 

  • “When we get comfortable, the old ways seep out to the surface.”  - Jason VanRuler 

  • “Every time a client says a negative message about themselves, I ask, is that the message you think God gave you?”  - Jason VanRuler 

  • “One of my great joys is working with people to eliminate distractions so they can focus on the truth and live the life God has called them to.”- Jason VanRuler 

  • “If we want to feel connected and we’re not feeling connected, a lot of times that emotional intimacy and depth is the missing link.”  - Jason VanRuler 

  • “When we get vulnerable and honest, it attracts intimacy from our partner and we have a different relationship.”  - Jason VanRuler 

  • “The marriage we want is often on the other side of vulnerability. We just don’t often know how to get there.”- Jason VanRuler

 

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

  •  Do you recognize any ways you haven’t gotten past your past? 

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

 

Mar 15, 2024

Are you a man living in the stress bubble? It’s when the years of marriage, career building and raising kids all happen at once. You’re figuring everything out, trying to be there for it all, and it. Is. Stressful. If you’re there, you want to hear from a godly dad who has been there. 

We’re so happy to share this conversation with Jim Ramos. Jim’s wisdom and experience will equip and encourage you to be the husband and dad you want to be. Don’t miss this episode.

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • Jim defines the 4 phases of fatherhood 

  • Advice for the dad who never had a role model to guide him

  • Common mistakes dads make in the “stress bubble” years 

  • Types of provision that the family needs from a husband / father

  • 3 easy things Jim did that he recommends for all couples 

 *Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

QUOTES

  • “Whether we tell our kids that we’ve made mistakes or not, they’re still noticing. Especially during those teen years.” - Jim Ramos

  • "Our families require much more than physical provision. The damage most men do has nothing to do with physical provision; it has to do with heart care and soul care.” Jim Ramos

  • “You don’t have to be flashy. You don't have to be Superman. You just have to show up.”   - Jim Ramos 

  • “As men we have to realize our wife is the most important person on the planet, and it’s our job to make one person feel special.”  - Jim Ramos 

  • “You will not be remembered for what you did 9-5, you will be remembered for what you did 5-9.”  - Jim Ramos 

 

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

  • Jim shared 5 traits that set a “man” apart from a “male”:

  1. Protect integrity
  2. Fight apathy 
  3. Pursue God passionately
  4. Lead courageously
  5. Finish strong each day 
  • Which one of these is God calling you to grow in today? 

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Mar 12, 2024

Dr. Kim has said that prayer is the #1 most impactful thing you can do for your marriage. Today he explains why that is, and how to make it a habit in your marriage. Today we want to make praying with your spouse more approachable by sharing 4 biblical prayers to pray with your spouse that will grow your marriage. 

The Bible lists a lot of reasons for marriage, and praying in line with God’s purpose and intention for marriage is very powerful. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • Why prayer is an essential act of spiritual protection against the enemy 

  • Why it’s so hard to get started, and how to overcome 

  • Healthy perspective shifts praying will provide in your marriage 

  • How to handle some of the uncomfortable realities of answered prayers 

  • The power of prayer to help you take personal responsibility

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

QUOTES

  • “Praying together puts God where he wants to be in our marriage: Right in the center of it. - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “The enemy does not want Christian marriages to work.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “When you pray together you find that it unites you.”  - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “There’s a ripple effect: It’s not just about the couple, it’s about the family; it’s about the community.” - Lindsay Few 

  • “I am more of who God created me to be after being married to Nancy all these years than I would have been without her.” -  Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “God put us together. He’s got some fun stuff for us to do. Let’s look out and let’s get this stuff going!” - Lindsay Few

  • Blame is a very human response…but we all have a way we can influence the world. We do have control over how we’re responding to God’s call on us.” - Lindsay Few

 

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

4 Prayers to Pray together: 

  • Protection from the enemy of our souls
  • That your marriage will sharpen you
  • Pray that your marriage be fruitful
  • That your marriage will be a light 

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Mar 5, 2024

When we pray, it can be tempting to make our prayers a wishlist. But praying in line with God’s word changes things, and today we’re talking about why that matters and how to pray biblically for your marriage. Today Dr. Kim shares 4 prayers that line up with Scripture that you can be praying daily to grow you, and your marriage! 

Don’t miss this powerful episode. We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

  • Why it matters to pray biblically

  • What makes a prayer biblical

  • The risk involved in praying these things, and the reward they provide

  • How these prayers have impacted Dr. Kim and Nancy’s marriage 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

QUOTES

  • We’ve probably all heard some things taught, or caught, that were not biblical. We’ve heard ideas like, 'If God loves you, He’ll make you happy,' or 'If you marry the right person, marriage will be easy,' that do not line up with Scripture.”- Lindsay Few 

  • “Trusting him may be the hardest first step for some of us, because we’re not sure what he’ll do.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “Sometimes the prayer we want answered is just the thing that’s easiest for us.” - Lindsay Few 

  • “He’s always good, even though we don’t see it at times.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “Each of us can be thankful that God knows not only what’s best for us, but for the whole world. We don’t have to be burdened with that. He’s got that.” - Lindsay Few 

  • “If you’re lining up with what God states in his word that He wants to have happen, that’s going to be really powerful.” - Lindsay Few 

  • “We can’t hide anything from God.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “Sexual desire is created for a reason. It’s not a secret from God.” - Lindsay Few 

 

4 Prayers to Grow You and Your Marriage: 

  • Pray that God will help you love like Christ loved. 

  • Ask God to search you, know your heart, and reveal any offensive way.

  • Pray that your desire will be for your spouse only. 

  • Ask God to help you see your spouse as He does. 

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

 

Feb 27, 2024

What does it look like to live in intimacy with God each day? We are delighted to have Faith Eury Cho with us today, sharing about what friendship with God means, even in the “wilderness” times in our lives. 

Faith is the CEO and founder of the Honor Summit, a gospel preacher, and author of the new book, Experiencing Friendship with God: How the Wilderness Draws Us to His Presence. Faith does a great job de-mystifying this lofty topic, so you don’t want to miss this conversation. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

 

Episode highlights include:  

  • What does “friendship with God” actually mean? 

  • Practical ways to “practice God’s presence,” even if it seems out of reach 

  • How friendship with God impacts marriage

  • How to grow spiritually with your spouse

  • Ways to take these concepts into parenting / grandparenting 

  • How to navigate the wilderness seasons of our faith 

 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here

 

QUOTES

  • “Sometimes without even knowing, we believe so that God can give us a better life.” - Faith Eury Cho

  • “Friendship with God is just intimacy on a day to day level.” Faith Eury Cho

  • “We need to really redefine what experience actually means. Because if we go into any relationship, any - our spouse, our kids, our friends - having a set agenda of what experiencing that relationship should look like to us, it can be very unhealthy really quick.” -  Faith Eury Cho

  • “Start simple. Start with something that is a natural offshoot to your regular rhythms of life.”  - Faith Eury Cho

  • “I remember moments I would tell God, ‘I don’t have a prayer to pray, I don’t have a song to sing, but I’m here.’”  - Faith Eury Cho

  • “God cares about every little thing, and we want to give him the opportunity to show us that.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

  • “Some of us are friends with fear, not the presence of God, and I think we’ve got to break up with our fear!” - Faith Eury Cho



QUESTIONS FOR YOU

  • What is one way you and your spouse like to worship God together? 

  • Have you seen God move during a ‘wilderness’ season? 

 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

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