Husbands, have you ever felt like your wife expects too much from you? Wives, have you checked whether your expectations are realistic?
Expectations in marriage can be a difficult topic, and they’re a very common source of marriage tension. Which is why today, we want to help break down misunderstandings around spouse expectations today, so that you can experience better connection and more joy in your marriage.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Wives may struggle to articulate their needs clearly.
Non-sexual affection enhances sexual intimacy.
Emotional connection is crucial for a healthy marriage.
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: Expectations don't have to be a source of conflict. There's a way to communicate and connect the different wants and needs you have in marriage.
Questions to Discuss:
Are there any expectations that you feel are “too much”?
Husbands, do you need more clarity from your wife about her expectations?
How would you rate how well you actively listen and engage with your spouse?
What would make you a more intentional listener? (time of day, location of conversation, free of distractions, etc.)
When was the last time you checked in with your spouse about the overall health of your marriage relationship.
What are the priorities in your marriage? Do you know your spouse’s priorities? How do they compare?
QUOTES
Wives want to be part of the decision making and feel like it’s a true partnership.
The better the non sexual connection and intimacy is, the better the physical connection and intimacy will be.
Most men weren’t raised to be emotionally expressive.
You don’t have to solve everything.
When I stopped trying to fix it, I heard her better.
A wife wants to feel prioritized.
Learning to say things in a way your spouse can hear takes practice.
You have to accept that God made us different as husband and wife.
The small consistent things you do matter more than perfection.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
We have several other AWESOME Resources on our website. Check those out HERE.
Check out our Bible Reading plans on YouVersion and make sure you’re following us there to keep current on all our newest plans!
Wives, have you felt that your husband expects too much from you? Husbands, have you checked whether your expectations are realistic?
Expectations of our spouse can be a difficult topic, and they are a really frequent source of marriage tension. That’s why today, we want to help break down misunderstandings around spouse expectations today, so that you can experience better connection and more joy in your marriage. Don’t let expectations trip your marriage up. Listen today and learn to deal with the wants and needs in your marriage.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Unvoiced expectations in marriage can lead to tension.
Communication is key to understanding each other's needs.
Wives should express their feelings of being drained.
Finding time for connection is essential for couples.
Respect and appreciation are crucial for husbands.
Physical affection is important beyond sexual intimacy.
Teamwork in parenting strengthens the marriage bond.
Articulating needs can help avoid misunderstandings.
Navigating challenges together fosters a stronger partnership. It's crucial to express needs and expectations in marriage.
Vulnerability can be challenging, especially for men.
Regular communication opportunities can help clarify needs.
Listening without trying to “fix it” is essential in relationships.
Understanding each other's perspectives fosters compassion.
Setting boundaries can enhance emotional support.
Counseling can provide valuable tools for communication.
Feeling overwhelmed is a signal for change, not failure.
Asking good questions can open up important conversations.
Investing in support can rejuvenate a marriage.
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: You can experience better connection and intimacy by learning how to navigate the misunderstandings around expectations.
Questions to Discuss:
Dr. Kim talked about the importance of framing your spouse in a positive way, are there places where you are negatively framing your spouse's wants or needs?
What boundary could you set today so that you could better meet a need for your spouse?
QUOTES
God didn’t give your husband maternal instinct and that’s ok. He’s a man and that’s actually a good thing for your children to experience.
Being overwhelmed as a woman doesn't make you a bad spouse. It’s a signal that something needs to change.
If you’re going to frame your spouse as the problem it’s not going to go well. If you frame your spouse as your teammate then you can work together and that’s really important.
Love and respect are something that husbands and men are designed to need.
If you’re stretching yourself way beyond your capacity then that’s where the negative things start to happen.
Wives, you don’t want your husband going to someone else for emotional support. You want him to go to you.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Are you experiencing the power of prayer in your marriage? Prayer is an incredibly powerful habit for your marriages. In fact, research shows that 99% of couples who pray together stay together.
Prayer can be so simple, but the reality is that most couples do not make prayer a regular part of their marriage. Today we’re talking about how to practically overcome the obstacles that keep you from praying together so you can make prayer a regular part of your marriage.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The #1 marriage-building habit - and why most couples don’t do it
What makes prayer so powerful for marriage
The sneaky prayer pitfalls to avoid
How to overcome the common obstacles that keep couples from praying together
The do-able DOs to make prayer part of your marriage
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: Prayer is so powerful that the enemy will try anything to keep you from making it part of your marriage. Don’t let that happen.
Questions to Discuss:
What’s the primary obstacle that prevents you from praying regularly with your spouse?
What would help the two of you to make prayer a regular part of your day together?
QUOTES
“When you’re praying together, you’re putting God first. That’s where he wants to be.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“It’s probably one of the main things that the enemy doesn’t want couples to do.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“When I can get a couple to pray together, the counseling process goes faster, and the marriage gets better.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Don’t force praying together in a certain way.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Episode highlights include:
Why listening to real stories of different experiences matters
How to become aware of your habitual assumptions
Realistic first steps to grow your perspective
Why addressing our perspective on race is essential for the church
The relationship-building process of navigating tough conversations
How to repair the relationship after you’ve hurt your spouse
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: Not every couple is in an interracial marriage, but every couple deals with differences. We get a bigger picture of God’s design when we stop fighting our differences and learn to value them.
Questions to Discuss:
What have you learned by listening to the diverse perspectives of others in your life?
Are there places in your life where you encounter differing life stories and experiences among fellow Christian believers?
How can you make room in your life for diversity that reflects the vision of God’s kingdom?
QUOTES
“We will never know everything there is to know about the Lord, but the beauty is in the pursuit, the relationship and the discovery.” - Adaeze Brinkman
“It’s a very humbling lesson to let your spouse have their own perspective, and give room for that to be different than yours.” - Adaeze Brinkman
“Everyone does what they do for a reason. They think what they think for a reason.” - Chad Brinkman
When we dig in we realize how much we have in common.” - Chad Brinkman
“When Jesus returns, it’s not going to be a ‘White Heaven’ or a ‘Black Heaven.’ It’s a diverse Heaven.” - Chad Brinkman
“Listening is the most important thing.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Are you growing? A beautiful way to do that is to rub shoulders with people that are different from you.” - Adaeze Brinkman
“The enemy knows there’s so much power in unity and diversity.” - Adaeze Brinkman
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
We loved Chad and Adaeze’s book, White Boy / Black Girl: What Our Differences Can Teach Us. Grab a copy to read their story!
It’s Spice things up in the bedroom with our limited-time ‘Break the Bedroom Rut’ Sexy BUNDLE!
Don’t let negative assumptions tear you apart. Use our Free Printable 15 Better Assumptions to Make About Your Spouse to nurture a healthy mindset
Get Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!
Guys, have you lost the spark in your sex drive? If that’s you, you are not alone! Libido is a complex issue. There are so many reasons that male libido can falter, from stress and physical factors, to relational issues in your marriage. But for every factor, there are also solutions.
Learn the steps to uncover what’s driving your lack of drive so you can revive the desire. We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The physical, mental and emotional health factors that affect sex drive
Tips to unpack the issue together in healthy ways
Is there a place for medical advice in understanding libido?
Challenging the cultural myths about aging and sex drive
Steps to starting a helpful conversation about improving libido
Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for quick weekly marriage tips!
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide
Main takeaway: Husbands, have you lost the passion? Physical, mental and emotional factors all impact your sex drive but you can reignite the spark and enjoy God’s gift of sex in marriage.
Questions to Discuss:
Dr. Kim said that things like depression, anxiety, financial stress, relational tension or past trauma can reduce libido. Are any of those affecting your sexual relationship today?
What would you like to experience more of together in your sexual relationship?
What can you do together to make that happen?
QUOTES
“If you’ve got problems from the past that affect you in the present, you need someone to help you work through that.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“When the assumptions got on the table, we realized they were wrong. That made such a huge difference.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Low libido doesn’t indicate cheating or porn addiction, it’s usually more complex than that.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
The longer you let it go, the worse it’s going to get. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Congrats to our Awesome Marriage of the Year - Brett and Megan Hamilton! To learn more about National Marriage week, visit their website HERE.
Spice things up in the bedroom with our limited-time ‘Break the Bedroom Rut’ Sexy BUNDLE!
Don’t let negative assumptions tear you apart. Use our Free Printable 15 Better Assumptions to Make About Your Spouse to nurture a healthy mindset
Get Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!
Wives, do you seem to be less interested in sex? It’s a common issue, and so many factors affect female libido, from hormonal changes, and emotional disconnection to just plain busyness.
Whether stemming from physical health or the health of your marriage, there are many ways you and your spouse can work together to bring back the passion and renew your sex drive.
Today, we’re troubleshooting the issue with tips for wives with low libido, so you can bring back the passion in your marriage. We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Tips on healthy communication about sex drive issues
Understanding the effects of stress on a wife’s sex drive
How to work together to share the mental load
Is lack of sex drive a sign of infidelity?
Building empathy to help reconnect and rekindle her passion
Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for quick weekly marriage tips!
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide
Main takeaway: Ladies, don’t let your sex life struggle! Learn to unpack the factors that impact your sex drive, so you can troubleshoot and get things back on track.
Questions to Discuss:
Are there any factors that you know are affecting your libido in this season? (Stress, exhaustion, depression, peri menopause, postpartum, etc.)
Are there any relationship factors affecting your interest in sex right now?
What would help you to mitigate the effects of those things today?
QUOTES
“For guys, it’s about how do I meet her where she is right now?” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“If there’s not full trust, it’s going to be very hard to be interested in sex.” - Lindsay Few
“It’s ok to talk about sex.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“There are so many things that typically the wife does by default. Look at what is weighing on you that keeps you from even having time to be interested in sex.” - Lindsay Few
“The really good marriages I see are the ones committed to working through things. It doesn’t come easy, but they’re committed to work through it.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Spice things up in the bedroom with our limited-time ‘Break the Bedroom Rut’ Sexy Bundle!
Some of our past episodes on Trust in Marriage:
Grab the free 15 Better Assumptions printable to start healing your perspective
Get Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!
Is technology bringing you closer together, or leading to disconnection?
Tech is hitting marriages hard today. Yet research shows that marriage can provide a huge boost to personal happiness. Today’s guest, Arlene Pellicane, has written several books on how technology is impacting relationships, and today she shares tech habits that will help you and your marriage to thrive.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The 1 habit that guarantees marriage success 99% of the Time
Easy ways to declutter your digital life for deeper connection
How modern technology is changing the way we love.
Are married people happier? Research tells the truth…
Break the tech spell: Tips for parenting in a digital age
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“If we seek God and His guidance, He’s always going to have an answer.” Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Is technology bringing you closer together? Or causing you to grow farther apart.” - Arlene Pellicane
“We're missing all these little times to connect. That’s why you feel disconnected.” - Arlene Pellicane
“You have to prepare to be unpopular, because as a parent, it’s your job to protect your child.” - Arlene Pellicane
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Grab Arlene’s new book, Making Marriage Easier, as well as her helpful books on healthy tech habits
Find all of the National Marriage Week resources, including tomorrow's live panel with Dr. Kim, on the WEB, FACEBOOK, X (TWITTER) or INSTAGRAM
Spice things up in the bedroom with our limited-time ‘Break the Bedroom Rut’ Sexy Bundle!
Learn more about what boundaries can do for your marriage in Dr. Kim’s free Building Healthy Boundaries Webinar. Learn more here!
Don’t let screens come between you: Use our free 17 Questions Every Couple Should Ask About Tech printable to get on the same page!
Your marriage doesn’t have to grow old just because you do. The second half of marriage does not have to grow stale - make plans to make these your best years yet! Listen today to learn how.
Whether you’re looking ahead to the second half of marriage, or you’re already there, it is a great time to improve and grow. In today’s episode, Dr. Kim shares tips to avoiding complacency and embracing the best version of your marriage in the second half.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
How to jumpstart marriage growth if you’ve gotten complacent
Practical steps to do the second half of marriage well - no matter where you are today
Tips to bring back the fun and passion later in marriage
Simple conversation starters to help you get going
How to find a mentor couple to help your marriage
Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for quick weekly marriage tips!
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: The second half of marriage does not have to grow stale - evaluate where you’d like to see your marriage go from here, then take the steps to get there.
Questions to Discuss:
What do you envision for your marriage in the next 5 years? 10 years? 20?
What is one thing you can start doing today to move you toward that vision?
What is one thing you need to stop doing today to move in that direction?
QUOTES
If your marriage has been teetering, it can fall at this stage. - Lindsay Few
Nothing is worse than feeling lonely when your spouse is with you. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
We’d seen couples who were older than us disconnect. We didn’t want that to happen. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
It’s never too late. But the earlier you start, the easier the transition will be. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
If you’re one step ahead, you can help somebody. - Lindsay Few
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Spice things up in the bedroom with our limited-time ‘Break the Bedroom Rut’ Sexy BUNDLE!
Have better conversations with your spouse using Creative Questions to Ask Your Spouse – check out the completely unique First, Second and Third editions of this popular resource!
Deepen emotional intimacy with the FREE Printable Heart to Heart Card Game ❤️
Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!
OR sign up for Dr. Kim’s One Thing email to get DAILY steps to build your marriage
Grab your copy of Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half of Marriage, by Dr. Kim and Nancy Kimberling
Your marriage should be a blessing to you and your spouse, but it does not need to stop there - a healthy marriage can also bless the world around you! Where is your marriage today? Are you and your spouse a healthy team? Are you healthy enough to pour into those around you?
Today we are delighted to welcome Dedric and Krystal Polite to the podcast today to share their unique perspective on finding a vision for their marriage that is making a mark on the world.
Listen for encouragement on enacting a Godly marriage vision this year!
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for quick weekly marriage tips!
Episode highlights include:
Breaking the cycle of generational poverty
Developing a life aligned with your values
Tips to date intentionally so that you find a spouse you can partner with
How to make your marriage a blessing to the world around you
Making your spouse your teammate - not your opponent
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: Make your marriage strong and healthy so it can become a vehicle for blessing your spouse, family and your community.
Questions to Discuss:
What ways could you intentionally bless others as a couple?
Think about the legacy you want to create as a couple. How would you define your marriage vision?
QUOTES
“Never tie your self worth into your net worth.” - Krystal Polite
“We pray together, we stay together, we work together.” - Krystal Polite
“We lean on each other’s strengths.” - Dedric Polite
Faith keeps us steady when the road gets rough.” - Krystal Polite
“Our purpose isn’t just to make it - we’re here to make a difference.” - Krystal Polite
“It starts and ends with effective communication.” - Dedric Polite
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Learn more from the Polites on their website PoliteWealthPortal.com
Build healthy habits in the New Year with the Healthy Marriage Rhythms Bundle: 5 resources for just ONE donation! Get all the details HERE!
Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!
Nominate a couple for Awesome Marriage of the Year HERE!
Spiritual intimacy is something couples want, but don’t really know how to get there. We can tend to believe a common myth that it should come naturally without any effort, plus it can seem awkward to pray together or pursue spiritual growth. So how can spiritual intimacy be a realistic part of marriage?
Today we’re talking about tangible ways to grow in spiritual intimacy with your spouse - and what NOT to do.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for quick weekly marriage tips!
Episode highlights include:
Why spirituality matters in marriage
Common mistakes couples make with spiritual intimacy
Can the wife initiate the conversation about spiritual intimacy, or does the husband need to do that as a spiritual leader?
Practical steps to growing together spiritually
Tips to grow your marriage to become a light and example
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: The spiritual domain is integral to our health and wellbeing. Sharing it with your spouse is an essential part of intimacy in marriage.
Questions to Discuss:
What practices / spiritual disciplines have been most impactful for your personal spiritual growth?
What is one spiritual practice you would like to share with your spouse?
QUOTES
“If you’re not able to share about spirituality with your spouse, it diminishes your ability to be intimate and know one another.” - Lindsay Few
“We wish we could have an awesome marriage without trying. But it does take effort.” - Lindsay Few
“When you have an expectation, you’ve got to share it with your spouse. Then they can let you know whether it’s realistic or not.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Most guys feel inadequate to be a spiritual leader. But God will equip you: It’s not rocket science, it’s just being intentional.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Most wives just want to see an intentional effort. It doesn’t have to be anything fancy.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Any time in the Word is better than none.” - Lindsay Few
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Build healthy habits in the New Year with the Healthy Marriage Rhythms bundle: 5 resources for just ONE donation! Get all the details HERE!
Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!
FLASH SALE! Browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com, and use code “FLASH2025” for $100 off ANY of our courses! Limited time only.
It's a new year, but it's still the same you and your spouse ... so how can you make your marriage the best it can be in the new year? With intentionality, you can break out of the habits that are not serving your marriage well, and build new ones that work better.
Listen today for the tips and tools to help! We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for quick weekly marriage tips!
Episode highlights include:
Signs that your marriage needs a “reset”
What NOT to do during a reset
Where to start if you want a “reset” but you’re not sure what to do
Tips to make sure you don’t fall back into the same old patterns?
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: Now is a great time to check in, take stock, and prioritize the healthy habits to make your marriage strong. Listen, then start taking steps today!
Questions to Discuss:
What do you want your marriage to look like in the new year?
What do you envision that’s different from how things are now?
Brainstorm 3-5 steps you want to build into your marriage this year.
Where will you start?
QUOTES
“I think we need this every year.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Don’t just see the red flags and ignore them.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
If we’re intentional in the New Year, we can really close the gap between what we have and what we want our marriage to look like.” - Lindsay Few
“You don’t have to agree on everything, but you have to be willing to compromise.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“God is for our marriage. He is for us. When we invite Him into the process it really changes things.“ - Lindsay Few
“Sometimes we have to sacrifice good things for what’s most important.” - Lindsay Few
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Build healthy habits in the New Year with the Healthy Marriage Rhythms Bundle: 5 resources for just ONE donation! Get all the details HERE!
FLASH SALE! Browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com, and use code “FLASH2025” for $100 off ANY of our courses! Limited time only.
If you haven’t browsed our site, you’ve GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com !
Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!